Robert Kubica has taken his “un-official” leading man status at BMW to new heights by swapping roles with John Cusack for this weekends Hungarian Grand Prix.
Insiders believe Robert’s dalliance with the Say Anything actor has arisen from comments made by itv hack James Allen after the Canadian Grand Prix when Allen was overheard saying that Kubica was “no Brad Pitt!”
Cusack is considered to be an all-rounde; capable of singing, dancing, and acting at a professional level, but never outshining his female co-star and Robert believes the swap should hold no unforseen dramas। “I have flattered my team-mate Nick Heidfeld in the last two races this season, and he can’t even get through the garage without even knocking over the furniture!”
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Tuesday, July 8, 2008
McLaren drop anvil on Newey
McLaren's bid to keep up the aggressive development of their MP4-23 continued on Tuesday when they ran an anvil wing engine cover for the first time at the Hockenheim test
The use of the engine cover follows the trend begun by designer Adrian Newey at Red Bull Racing and since copied by Renault and Force India. McLaren F1 CEO Martin Whitmarsh believes copying the design is providing excellent value for money.
“It’s ****ing awesome!” explained Whitmarsh. “Not only don’t we have to pay for the designs, but we’re getting money back off Adrian after that 11th hour deal in ’04 that really screwed our budget. If you’re reading this Adrian.. screw unto others as they screw unto you!”
Newey is reportedly consulting the ACME users guide for ‘Advanced Revenge Techniques’ before making any statement.
The use of the engine cover follows the trend begun by designer Adrian Newey at Red Bull Racing and since copied by Renault and Force India. McLaren F1 CEO Martin Whitmarsh believes copying the design is providing excellent value for money.
“It’s ****ing awesome!” explained Whitmarsh. “Not only don’t we have to pay for the designs, but we’re getting money back off Adrian after that 11th hour deal in ’04 that really screwed our budget. If you’re reading this Adrian.. screw unto others as they screw unto you!”
Newey is reportedly consulting the ACME users guide for ‘Advanced Revenge Techniques’ before making any statement.
Saturday, July 5, 2008
Webber takes a punt
On Friday, punters could place a bet on Heikki Kovolainen securing his F1 breakthrough at 23 to 1 - and Red Bull racer Webber fancied a piece of the action."I've put 200 quid on Heikki at 23 to 1, so I'm in good shape," he smiled in the Silverstone media centre. “Anyone else who wants a piece can come to me”.
Webber, who qualified second to the Finn was circumspect when quizzed if he was involved in ‘match fixing’.“Let’s just say I’ll be pitting on lap 3” he grinned.Pole sitter Kovalainen said he has not placed a similar bet. "I don't do betting. I try to earn my money in a safer way.. Pimping out whores!”
Webber, who qualified second to the Finn was circumspect when quizzed if he was involved in ‘match fixing’.“Let’s just say I’ll be pitting on lap 3” he grinned.Pole sitter Kovalainen said he has not placed a similar bet. "I don't do betting. I try to earn my money in a safer way.. Pimping out whores!”
Button and Hamilton size up
In a lively press conference ahead of their home race, the McLaren and Honda drivers got involved in an entertaining exchange that resulted in Hamilton eventually accepting the challenge after regular cock-fight runner Button offered to give money to charity if he lost.
“What if I say £10,000 to the charity of your choice if you beat me? What do you think?” Jenson asked.
“Are you trying to steer me off this championship or what?” Lewis replied.
Button then countered: “It’s the only thing I can be competitive in at the moment. Think about it.”
Then asking further pressing on whether the event would take place by the assembled reporters, Hamilton eventually agreed: “The biggest incentive is, if I do beat you, then you’ve got some money for a charity which is great. However, you do have an advantage as you’ve already done one, and I already know that by doing one you’re better the next time. But man, I’m up for it, I’m up for it.
He then added: “OK, let’s do it. It’s a date.”
The third British driver in the press conference, David Coulthard had already ruled himself out of going up against his two younger compatriots, with the Scot, heading for retirement at the end of the season, saying at 37 he “was too old”.
He did however offer to be “chief arbiter at the weigh-in.
“What if I say £10,000 to the charity of your choice if you beat me? What do you think?” Jenson asked.
“Are you trying to steer me off this championship or what?” Lewis replied.
Button then countered: “It’s the only thing I can be competitive in at the moment. Think about it.”
Then asking further pressing on whether the event would take place by the assembled reporters, Hamilton eventually agreed: “The biggest incentive is, if I do beat you, then you’ve got some money for a charity which is great. However, you do have an advantage as you’ve already done one, and I already know that by doing one you’re better the next time. But man, I’m up for it, I’m up for it.
He then added: “OK, let’s do it. It’s a date.”
The third British driver in the press conference, David Coulthard had already ruled himself out of going up against his two younger compatriots, with the Scot, heading for retirement at the end of the season, saying at 37 he “was too old”.
He did however offer to be “chief arbiter at the weigh-in.
Monday, June 30, 2008
Bourdais Sees Red
A promotional stunt for Red Bull in Pamplona yesterday has left two Australians injured।
Sebastian Bourdais seriously gored two Australian brothers, catching one on each of the Torro Rosso’s winglets during a Red Bull festival in Pamplona, but both were recovering Friday in the hospital
Lenahan was gored in the buttocks, while Michael, 23, of Carrara, was injured in his leg and was recovering favorably from surgery at the same hospital.
Promoters intended to keep Bourdais running at 20k/ph, but disintegrated shortly after Lenahan (a Will Power supporter) called Bourdais a “whinging f****t!”
"I remember looking back and thinking I was in trouble," Lenahan said।
"I think my brother and I overestimated Bourdais’ sense of humour
Sebastian Bourdais seriously gored two Australian brothers, catching one on each of the Torro Rosso’s winglets during a Red Bull festival in Pamplona, but both were recovering Friday in the hospital
Lenahan was gored in the buttocks, while Michael, 23, of Carrara, was injured in his leg and was recovering favorably from surgery at the same hospital.
Promoters intended to keep Bourdais running at 20k/ph, but disintegrated shortly after Lenahan (a Will Power supporter) called Bourdais a “whinging f****t!”
"I remember looking back and thinking I was in trouble," Lenahan said।
"I think my brother and I overestimated Bourdais’ sense of humour
Thursday, June 19, 2008
Creepy Old Man evicted from BMW pits
As a recent guest of BMW at the Canadian Grand Prix, pop icon Cliff Richard managed to slip past security and into Robert Kubica’s change room. Unaware who Cliff Richard was, a surprised Robert was left dumbfounded;
“Do you see someone you know?”, Cliff asked.
With a furled brow Robert said, “No”.
“Oh, now I remember. It was in a dream” Cliff answered.. “You were sitting over there at that table, except in the dream you were girl with black hair.. You don't wanna hurt yourself driving.. Make sure you stretch out those creamy hamstrings.”
“Piss off, you perverted old douche bag!” Robert was heard screaming.
“Do you see someone you know?”, Cliff asked.
With a furled brow Robert said, “No”.
“Oh, now I remember. It was in a dream” Cliff answered.. “You were sitting over there at that table, except in the dream you were girl with black hair.. You don't wanna hurt yourself driving.. Make sure you stretch out those creamy hamstrings.”
“Piss off, you perverted old douche bag!” Robert was heard screaming.
Renault Counts the Cost
A recent Renault survey conducted in May, comprised of responses from employees representing a variety of sources including their race team, test team and factory based representatives. 60% of employees divulged that they had stolen from their employer; some justifying the thefts as “justified for lack of compensation for overtime”
Flavio Briatore dismissed the thievery as “petty”, but failed to acknowledge that missing post-its, paper clips and rubber bands only accounted for 28% of stolen items। One enterprising employee decided to rescue an unused J-Damper that had been sitting on an empty desk for over a year, while a number of ‘O’ Rings have turned up on eBay posing as a titanium backgammon set।
Flavio did admit however, that the biggest thing people take from their office is time. “We all spend time each day making personal calls, emailing, IMing and surfing the net for strawberry-flavoured G-Strings.. I think that loss of productivity is a much more substantial economic loss than office supplies".
Flavio Briatore dismissed the thievery as “petty”, but failed to acknowledge that missing post-its, paper clips and rubber bands only accounted for 28% of stolen items। One enterprising employee decided to rescue an unused J-Damper that had been sitting on an empty desk for over a year, while a number of ‘O’ Rings have turned up on eBay posing as a titanium backgammon set।
Flavio did admit however, that the biggest thing people take from their office is time. “We all spend time each day making personal calls, emailing, IMing and surfing the net for strawberry-flavoured G-Strings.. I think that loss of productivity is a much more substantial economic loss than office supplies".
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